For the past several years I have been struggling with feeling extremely exhausted at least a few days a week. Even on "good" days, I don't have the energy I once had. I have been living with PTSD for years now and I know many people suffer from fatigue as a side effect of PTSD so I just thought it was a "normal" PTSD thing. Lately, I have been researching Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. There is no way what I feel is "normal" so there has to be something more to it.
A little about my health & lifestyle for context. I was a dancer & a dance instructor for many years. I would dance at least 3 hours a day and at that time I walked about 5 miles a day. I have eaten healthy & plant-based since October 2005. I eat a lot of whole foods & not a lot of processed stuff. I take supplements that I know I need as a vegan person including B12, K2 & D3 among other things.
Around the spring of 2018, I started being "tired" a lot. I was not able to hold up to dance as long as I used to be able to. I kind of chopped it up to just not feeling inspired to dance or not being able to find music I wanted to dance to. When I would dance I would get tired quickly. I was still walking a lot at this time but not my usual 5 miles a day.
A few months before this I was held at gunpoint so I spent a lot of time thinking about that & trying to figure out what happened. I was officially diagnosed with PTSD on September 28th, 2018.
As far as I know, I am healthy from a physical standpoint. I suffer from a few mental health problems but nothing else.
Because of this, I have done a ton of research about PTSD, how to heal, things to watch out for & anything I can think of to improve my mental health. I know PTSD is not curable but I still do my best to get as well as I can.
I have regular panic attacks, I shake a lot, oftentimes I feel dizzy when I walk (like walking on a boat), I am very forgetful nowadays & I am exhausted more than 50% of the time. This makes it nearly impossible to work a full-time job & if I'm being honest, it makes it hard to work for someone at all because I can't control when these things will happen to me. I might be A-OK part of the day but a total mess for other parts of the day. Most days I am able to accomplish things I need to do digitally but the part about not knowing when I will suddenly crash makes it really hard to commit to a time to be somewhere or be accounted for. It sucks. It is scary too because I need to work. This is why I decided to share my story on YouTube & start my Etsy shop. I am hoping to earn money to make ends meet.
Since I am starting to research CFS and learn about how this might be a whole other thing I have to deal with, I thought it would be a good idea to document it here too! I know so many chronic illnesses are hard to get diagnosed so I have a feeling this will be years in the making.